just to add to the post below

i don't want the tag "my sister my hero" to give the impression that i am playing favorites in my family.

the more i learn about them the more i realize the amazing things my family members have been capable of and they all are heroes to me in one way or another.

from battling mental disorder, to sacrificing their careers to raise their family, or working harder then they should have to just to provide a better life for their children, and working in the non-profit world to create a program to help challenged kids.

my family is made up of extraordinary people and i guess i just want to know where i fit in with them.


it occurs to me

i was reading my sister Maria's curriculum vitae online tonight.

i have always maintained that there is a real disconnect between me and the rest of my family. not that we don't love each other or talk to each other but still i feel so different from the rest of them.

and this gets proven again when i look at all my sister's accomplishments and i realize that i know nothing about what she has done with her career.

she is a college professor and as i have stated before she has just published her first scholarly work but i still don't understand what she specializes in or what her interests are in her studies.

maybe i am afraid that given my normal tendency to disagree on alot of things with her and and my brother-in-law i won't be able to seperate them from their beliefs and i want to just view them as my sister and brother-in-law, no controversy, no arguments and i can have my familial bond in a state of complete blissful ignorance of the topics that she has devoted her life to researching and pursuing with her considerable intelligence.

at this point people always wonder if i am upset that she converted to Islam and to that degree i have to say no.

Islam is something that is thought of as quite divisive in today's political climate. i like to think that my lack of any real interest in following any given religion gives me some sort of view where i can not buy into all the generalizations that i am presented with in the media and just see her as my sister. she is not crazy as is also assumed when i mention her religious beliefs. i respect her deeply for choosing what she wants to believe in even if i don't fully understand it.

the heart of the matter is that Maria is and will always be an amazing person. she is smart and compassionate and never judges anyone in our family or treats them any differently then the way she treated them years ago before the conversion. and as i read her curriculum vitae i am amazed at what she has accomplished and what she has risked in the pursuit of her beliefs and what she wants to learn and say on them.

i hope in ten years when i am her age i can look back on my own career and be able to say i followed my heart and my brain in the right direction and that it will have provided me with a better life for myself the current state of adjustment i currently am residing in.


two days notice

and i still managed to come up with some idea for a short solo for ryan's new death metal demo. it was kind of sloppy but he assured me it was ok due to the fact that it is just at the demo stage right now.

trying to shred again gave me some serious blisters on my fingertips. i guess that is what happens when all you have is an acoustic guitar laying around and you pretend you are a singer/songwriter and not a metal guitar god.

in other music news, i bought an ocarina. just a cheap starter one to get the technique down. i am hoping to build an army of instruments for use on the next baliset album.

i hate that i come up with good ideas but then i blog about them and all of a sudden the jinx strikes and a setback happens so i am just going to keep my mouth shut for the time being.

here is a random list of nothing relevant...things i got really excited about this week:

1. the iron maiden somewhere back in time tour next year - sure i have known about it for a few weeks but it doesn't stop bringing a smile to my face.

2. Julie recommended the comic book "preacher" and i got volume 1 last night and couldn't sleep till i finished it. it was mesmerizing and between that and the walking dead i have a good amount of new comic material to go through since i finally finished the sandman, v for vendetta, from hell, and watchmen.

3. the heroes season premiere was amazing...like joss whedon amazing which is saying something since i felt they went out with a whimper in may. but a strong opening that makes the season finale look a little better is a good thing and redeems my feelings on their writing staff.

4. Mike Gravel - the man has no chance of getting the democratic nomination because he is too old and curmudgeonly but that is exactly what made him so amazing in the debates last night. he didn't have to try and impress voters...he just verbally bitch-slapped hilary clinton, barack obama, and john edwards and that is what we need in a debate. we need someone to really play the extreme asshole card and catch them off guard and see who can really defend their policies and show us true presidential material. so far i am not all that impressed by any of them. they each have good ideas but the fringe candidates like gravel and kucinich just impressed me more because they have no reason to sugar coat their agendas, they aren't trying to fool anybody and it really made the debates more of a debate and not just robotic reading of pre-planned and rehearsed answers with $500 haircuts.


its late and i have been working out the website a bit.

i have found i can't stick with one design long enough without it being ultra-cheesy in my opinion so here is my latest attempt.

i also signed up for nimbit which for those who don't know is an online music tool for indie artists that allows them to create cool webpages as well as setting up an online store for selling my stuff.

signing up for it definitely got me thinking about how i want to pursue stuff and i am hopeful to have something there in the early part of 2008.

the artwork for a time for rust is nearing completion and once i have settled everything with the artist i will probably be posting the cover art which is fucking amazing.

now i go to sleep

where i am a viking!



In my latest attempt at

In my latest attempt at pushing the boundaries of workplace attire i am wearing a red iron maiden shirt for red, white, and blue casual day


new tuning tuesday


works well with the capo on the fifth fret