Baliset: Touching Nerves

2010-03-04T22:16:00.002-05:00

First of all, that is NOT the name of the new album or a new song or anything like that.

I always would imagine as a kid that one day I would be a famous musician and I was always "preparing" answers to questions that would inevitably be asked about what my creative process is like and what was mentally going on while I prepared songs and solos, etc.

I may not have had a CLUE as to what the process would be like but I figured one day someone might care enough to ask me and I wanted to be prepared!

However, no is really asking me and while I really am not sure anyone is interested to know, I do want to mention something briefly. I was working on a new riff tonight. Without giving away what it will end up doing or what the song name is, I will say that cranking the amp up and recording it and listening back to it at full volume and writing parts over it did something to me. I was feeling almost manic and transfixed afterwards, like I had given birth to some crazed beautiful baby that was destroying the delivery room and singing a melody with a perfect voice at the same time.

It was awe and destruction all at once and while it is only a 2 minute piece for one of my songs, it gave me the confidence that i really am going in the right direction with some of these ideas and gave me hope for this album. Not that i didn't have that before but it felt stronger.

Back In The New York Groove

2010-02-07T23:12:00.002-05:00

I am sitting in bed tired. I have had a weird couple of weeks.

I got a nasty bout of supposed pneumonia which forced me to cancel a high profile Baliset gig, and miss work.

Then i went back to work and finished out the week with not one but TWO Baliset gigs and a guest gig sitting in with Kayo Dot to perform Choirs of the Eye in its entirety at The Stone in NYC.

I am choosing to talk about this because it had a profound effect on me. It was inpsiring to say the least. I got to hear the new KD album in full performed live and during the performance I had visions of creativity and sparks flying into my brain to help me write for the next Baliset album.

And it also was weird because i felt alot like Captain Jack Harkness at the end of Doctor Who season 3. You are teased into believing that he might rejoin the Doctor for adventures but in the end he tells the Doctor that he has his own team now and they need him and that summed up my feelings on Baliset. They are my team now and I feel more comfortable musically with them than anyone else I have ever played with and while it was fun living the fantasy life of being in Kayo Dot complete with a sold out crowd and exhuberant fans shaking your hand and making you feel larger than life, I missed my team.

I am happy with the success we have built for ourselves and if i took one thing away from this whole experience, it is that it gave me a focus point in my head for the next album.

But Toby and the rest of KD know they can call on me for help at any time and as a friend I will help them with whatever they need but as I return to my life of anonymity once again, I do get excited for working on where aliset my new team is going.

How You Can Support Baliset e.g. Mailing List And Pre-Orders

2009-01-23T19:44:00.002-05:00

Hello Friends,

As I have already mentioned, the Baliset album will be out March 17. As we are getting closer to the release date I would like to let you know of some cool ways those of you enjoy the music you have heard on the page can support this project.

For those of you who are not aware, this band's album is a completely self-funded, self-released, self-promoted effort.

In looking for ways to help defray the cd manufacturing costs I have teamed up with Nimbit to manufacture the cds and through them we will be offering a special chance to pre-order A Time For Rust and get some bonus goodies.

The complete details have not been squared away but what it is looking like is that the pre-orders will be $10 and in addition to getting the cd when it is released you will also get a poster and a download card good for bonus tracks not available any other place.

We are including these bonuses to encourage you, the fan, the casual observer, the friend, the foe, or whoever you might be to purchase a pre-order and help to financially support us in releasing the debut album and in turn you can feel good about yourself for helping to support true independent music.

So please go to www. baliset. net and in the Nimbit storefront that is on the page there is a link to sign up for our mailing list and please do sign up so that when we have the pre-order information ready to go you can be the first to know as well as hearing about upcoming shows (yes we will be playing live to support the album).

Also please check out the baliset myspace at www. myspace. com/baliset to see a video I made for the song "A Time For Rust" and hear some other samples!

Thanks for your time!

Baliset

99 problems but a mix ain't 1...

2008-11-29T00:52:00.003-05:00

now that i have the album 99% in the bag my brain is starting to move on from it.

with just the mastering left to go i feel like i can divert my focus on these songs for now since i have all the parts in place and adding that last polish seems to be an easy feat in terms of gathering my knowledge of what i need to do.

so in the meantime i have been diving full on into the next two things.

the first is as all acoustic thing i have been thinking of doing for some time. it has the tentative title of "to the king of all night's dreaming." it is a deeply personal piece of work and i have felt really right about working on it. the songs and lyrics came pretty naturally and i am definitely not trying to make some type of epic thing. i think it will be a good process to help me emotionally deal with alot of things that i have had going on that happened more or less after the a time for rust writing process had happened.

the second thing is already thinking about baliset ii. i am not giving a title or anything yet and i am trying to approach it more thoughtfully then the last one. i want to have the songs pretty much demoed as complete as possible before going into record. again i am trying to strip away some of the epic yearnings i had with the a time for rust stuff. the songs are shorter but i am getting a picture of the overall album and i am really psyched about it and since Adam and i have already started hashing out the songs it has been a pretty fun time for me creatively having him with me to bounce ideas off and then to help flesh out the songs that until then were mostly just existing as acoustic ditties.

getting closer and closer!

2008-11-07T16:11:00.004-05:00

as the news bit on the baliset homepage suggests, i have committed to a timeline and release date for the album, this allows me to feel confident i can get the album out on time because in order to achieve this goal and publish the date i needed to plan out how exactly the next four months will go.

i have one more tracking/mixing session left to polish up a few vocal lines still troubling me and tweak the mixes ever so slightly.

next we have mastering in december with colin which will allow me to have the finished project ready for pressing so that in turn leads to...

promos in january. just getting some promo versions of the cd printed up with the artwork for the cd so i can start sending them out and then saving up money to release the thing in march. phew...

not to mention that i am not allowing myself the luxury of resting on my laurels since i have two bonus tracks to finish at home that will be included as b-sides to the single in january, an acoustic album i am writing AND conceptualizing baliset album #2. adam and i have a rehearsal planned for sunday and i am hoping to demo the first new track and get that process going too.

its an exciting time but i am trying to keep my head and not get too stressed or over-confident and just go with the flow so to speak.

in the studio

2008-09-17T11:44:00.003-05:00

it feels good to start the finishing up process on the album.

there's still a ton of vocals left to be done BUT since i am doing those in october we have had the better part of two days to focus our effort on getting the existing parts mixed so as to make the process of integrating the new vocals in october smoother and leave the project on schedule to be completed in time for my mastering session in december.

i try to contain both my excitement and impatience and i just keep my eyes on the prize so to speak (i hate cliches) and try to not get cocky or arrogant about it and just let the album fall into place on its own.

still as we sit here in the control room and i hear the individual tracks we have recorded over the years and hear the rhythm guitar i recorded in 2003, the solo i recorded in 2005 and the additional guitars and keyboards i added here in 2008 and i think about what the songs were in my head back then and what i imagined they would sound like finished back then and now how they are turning out now and its pretty amazing how they have grown and i am really in awe of how cool they are becoming and that somehow makes the five years and frustration worth it.

pre-studio jitters

2008-09-09T21:46:00.003-05:00

i have told many people about this before but i do get these jitters the entire week before i go to the studio. will i remember all the parts i wrote? will i be able to accomplish what i need to accomplish?

there is added pressure this time because this is what will amount to be the last couple days of tracking and the beginning of the long mixing process but it also means that the album is nearing completion.

more updates will come soon...

2/18/08?

2008-05-01T21:58:00.005-05:00

you mean its been almost 3 months since my last post?

well for starters i am busy. not busy in the working 70 hours a week sense but more in the "busy living inside my own head" sense.

sometimes i come out. i watch movies, i kiss Julie, i write new songs, i start a techno project half-jokingly, i finish a track in the studio, i go to england, i come back home again, i go to work, i come home from work, i find a new apartment, i cut out alot of my ties to the outside world temporarily...you know "busy."

but seriously, this year is whipping me pretty bad with its pace. the good news is that i am confident i can finish the album this year and also maybe play out to support it a bit.

if anything sums this year up it is the intense nervous feeling i deal with every day. there's so many things i could talk about but won't. i like my own head sometimes even when its a scary place.

i hope to bring better news over the summer when the album looks closer to being done but i need to spend more time finishing the tunes before i make that report.

"we're not away to remain away"

new demo day

2008-02-18T00:52:00.000-05:00

therapy

2008-02-10T23:19:00.001-05:00

now there was a band!

back in the 90's everyone thought therapy was like the saviors of rock music.

what a time for music!

oh wait a minute...i never listened to therapy...

now therapy is something i am going through right now and i am enjoying it. my therapist is not the type to lecture me about the mental conditions i have or the type to throw clinical stuff at me. he just asks a question and lets me babble on until he finds a thread to delve deeper into. and i do babble and he knows it makes me uncomfortable if he doesn't say anything and just looks at me and that makes me babble even more!

but it helps me think. it helps me ask questions about myself that i am not even sure i have felt like asking before and it brings up the fact that my condition is not something easily fixed overnight.

the nitty and the gritty

2008-02-09T15:05:00.000-05:00

i am reminded about the work involved in finishing music as i have been sitting around analyzing the chords in my music and trying to figure out the musical explanation for what my songs do so that i can intellectually craft backing parts and harmonies.

its easy to write neat sounding chord progressions while in an alternate tuning using my ear. or just play the solo parts over and over and solo over them for hours until something sticks.

but this step of finding ways to tie all the chaos and happy accidents together requires skills i haven't used much and sometimes i forget i have. but it just takes time and energy and remembering theory to figure it out.

a new addition to the family!

2008-01-06T21:12:00.001-05:00

xmas post!

2007-12-24T15:29:00.000-05:00

so it has been a pretty relaxing couple of days just hanging out here in CT with the fam.

also, and i hope he doesn't mind me posting this, but i was fortunate enough to have toby play me an advance preview of the new kayo dot album.

i won't go into a whole lot of detail or spoilers but i was very impressed hearing it. i was nervous about listening to it because i wasn't sure how i would feel. would i feel weird not being on it? but honestly, after giving it a good listen that thought didn't enter my mind. i really feel like toby progressed his sound on this one and while i am amazed by what he has done i felt ok being on my own.

it was definitely a cool experience for me as both a listener and for my own kind of mental closure i guess on my decision from a year ago.

but i will wholeheartedly endorse this album as i do believe it is an amazing piece of work and i think alot of people will enjoy it immensely and it will probably raise the kayo dot profile a whole lot. it reminded me of back in 2001 when i had this same kind of vibe about bath and leaving your body map. this time though, with a proper label behind it and some of the good momentum that was built up over the last few years i think toby will achieve what i thought his music would achieve 7 years ago.

studio update

2007-12-21T09:52:00.000-05:00

awareness

2007-12-16T21:23:00.000-05:00

i was in the ER on friday.

panic attack...big one.

riding home on the T and everything went nuts.

rode in an ambulance...thankfully i have insurance.

no matter how much good enters into my life. No matter how much i am able to be thankful that for once i don't have to sleep alone at night, no matter how much progress or fun i have musically...this disease inside me is still there and it doesn't care how happy i am and will strike when it feels necessary.

but i am tired of it. i am tired of just taking pills to fight it. i don't want to ever feel like i did in that ER on friday ever again.

i am starting cognitive behavioral therapy and i am going to war with anxiety and depression because they have robbed me of alot but i am not going to let them rob me anymore.

the key word here is "organization"

2007-12-10T19:51:00.000-05:00

i feel really good about the re-tooled melodies for black light moon. they are a little less hectic and they transition very smoothly and i think i will be able to sing them which is is of chief importance.

i am also planning on adding a guitar part and adding the other guitar and keyboard parts i have on cd.

had the jet fuel coffee at work today and it made my brain go all crazy and start planning what i should do for the rest of the album. i came up with some ideas and i hope i can make them take form in the right way.

a highlight for the weekend was sitting around watching movies after i got all that music work done. i got to see mary shelley's frankenstein which was way better thatn i had always imagined it would be. also Julie and i went to see beowulf in 3D which was AWESOME.

also had commando on in the background while Julie was studying in the living room. She was busying herself learning and i was busying myself laughing like a little kid every time arnold made some funny-ass pun before he killed someone. good times.

my brain is in a delicate place right now. i have been off my zoloft for a few weeks now, maybe even a month and it is not a fun feeling. i am planning on going back on them and also am working on finding a behavioral therapist so that maybe just aybe i can lead some decent sort of life without being the hypochondriac wreck i currently am most of the time.

for some strange reason the music of devin townsend and strapping young lad seems to soother more than anything else.

all you need is love

2007-12-02T01:29:00.000-05:00

i am sitting here revising the verse lyrics for Black Light Moon for what seems like the umpteenth time.

i believe that sometimes the longer you sit on a song or piece the more you revise it and the more trouble it causes you when all you want is nothing more than to have a finished product for the world to see or in this case hear.

this conundrum gave me lots of issues over these last few years but there is some point to it...some higher truth that i am supposed to be learning here and that is discovering my own voice even if what it is saying is not so revolutionary but instead is honest.

the songs on this album are not going to be trend-setting or revolutionary. i won't be getting "most unique" songwriter of the year awards but i am learning through these songs how i am supposed to be expressing myself.

take this song for instance. i wrote the basics of what would become Black Light Moon right around the time i wrote the song A Time For Rust so the song initially came from a very dark but hopeful place. the protagonist in it is tired of what he is feeling. he looks at himself and feels like even though he may give off a normal appearance there is a giant black light on him which, as anyone who ever went to a goth night dressed all in black knows, exposes hidden dirt and/or flaws that normally can't be seen. this leads to resigning himself to his fate of drifting, or basically continually moving forward in the hope that eventually he will find someone to find rest with along the way and understand him and ease the troubles as life keeps moving forward.

now we move forward to 2007 and things are not like they were back when i started writing it and i am discovering new things about my character and coupled with the fact that i listen to the old verses and cringe a bit, i decided it was time for some changes. and i discovered that what i have here is a love song.

and i fought with this concept for awhile because growing up as a metalhead you dread those two words like the plague. but here it is in front of me saying in the voice of toki wartooth "i am a love song and you gots to deals with it."

now at this point you are thinking "oh greg, you went and got yourself a girlfriend and now you feel the need to be all romantic and wussy" and you know what? you're probably right because what I have discovered is that I have experienced new things this year because of my relationship and it completely re-informs the characters that I am writing about. Now I am not saying this song is directly about my relationship but what I will say is that being in the situation I was in back in Rhode Island definitely gave me that initial spark of creativity to write the song and understand its basic structure and story but my relationship this year has taught me what this song is really about.

the protagonist is not supposed to be alone and drifting because no one is truly alone but we all are drifting through life in some way. some people may feel they are more ambitious than others but regardless of where you are life is pushing you forward and my character needs to tell you he is not alone but has found that one person who makes him realize things will be ok. and drifters can find their place.

and while i sit here explaining it i think to myself "but how can i really write a love song that sounds different" and the point is that i can't. i have been fortunate to be around creative lyricists like Toby and Byron and Byron wrote the most unique love song ever i think with his lyrics to "Undine and Underwater Flowers" but in trying to be as unique in my lyrics i would not be doing the song justice, i would merely be exposing myself as someone trying to sound better than i am.

Instead i am trying to reach for the "right" words to say in these lyrics and the "right" words to describe love and if that means they don't sound new or fresh then it doesn't matter because they are honest and true to what i am feeling now and therefore no matter what they are the "right" words to say and my song can be created and finished with the knowledge that i have achieved some measure of truth and to me that is more important than trying to be some uber-poet so i can get some kind of meaningless accolade. i practice the new words and already i feel i am bringing a deeper emotional resonance out of the song then previously i was and it makes me excited!

but the question that the song leaves me with is...is my character's person that he found for real or is it just a really amazing dream that gives him hope to move on? i am still not sure of the answer there and that is the way i like it.

Black Light Moon is a love song and you all's got's to deal with it.

What Any Good Boston Musician Works On During Their Commute

2007-11-22T00:18:00.000-05:00

Lyrics, Crosswords, and Su Doku

Fantasy Singers

2007-11-21T23:35:00.000-05:00

Since the blog is back online finally, albeit not in the way i completely wanted, i wanted to add a fun little idea I had for a post today.

Toby have had many music discussions over the years and one that always stuck with me was when I was struggling with being a vocalist Toby recommended the idea of actually going out and asking a vocalist I liked to guest on my album. I was skeptical but his idea resonated with me because essentially it is not about actually getting said vocalist or any guest instrumentalist on your album as much as it is about believing in you music enough that having someone of a high stature would actually not be a stretch and that is something you can do.

Its all about confidence.

Now of course I decided against finding vocalists for A Time For Rust besides myself because honestly I am stubborn with these songs. I wrote them and during the process of their creation I wanted to horde it all to myself because I that si what I want for these songs. They are personal to me and I want to sing them, no matter what other people tell me or criticize me on.

So onto the fun idea, I decided that thinking ahead for the newer Baliset songs I want to open up the creative process and be more collaborative and thought I would compile a list of all the vocalists I really would love to work with and maybe eventually someone will read this in the future and help hook it up. =)

Greg's Dream List Of Vocalists I Want To Work With

1. Kevin Moore - Chroma Key

2. Blitz - Overkill

3, Rufus Wainwright

4. Chris Boltendahl - Grave Digger

5. Mikael Akerfeldt - Opeth

6. Anneke - The Gathering

7. Colleen Kinsella - Cerberus Shoal/Fire on Fire

8. Dave Dill

one year later

2007-10-25T21:02:00.000-05:00

its been almost one year since the kayo dot tour ended and all the craziness that ensued with it.

i look at what the remnants of the band are doing now and i feel strangely unimportant.

obviously toby and mia continued on with kayo dot and in addition to getting to record and self-release his tartar lamb project, toby also composed the entire new kayo dot album and from what i am told it is going to be very different but toby seems genuinely excited about it, moreso then i have seen him in a while so i have high hopes.

forbes is now booking a bunch of shows at a music space in hyde park and also keeping up with his own recording and gigging career and doing well for himself in that regard and getting more high profile gigs.

and then ryan, john, and tom have formed a new band called ehnahre and given the little bit i heard of the project when i recorded a solo for their demo, i was really excited about the project and now i see they started a myspace page and have gotten some extremely positive praise.

and here i am still plotting how the baliset album will eventully surface, these guys are all making me feel very un-productive. which means, i need to start working harder! i don't want them to have all the fun now would i?

i keep thinking i should post a blog about why i quit the band, not just to explain for anyone who wants to see it but also to make peace with myself on why i did it.

anyhoo, above all the crap that led to what happened in the band and above the different sides of that discussion, i have to say that these guys are some talented ass motherfuckers and to see them moving onwards towards really cool musical experiences and projects makes me happy.

after 15 years even i sometimes don't understand it

2007-10-10T19:41:00.000-05:00

i spend months upon months agonizing over musical ideas or lack thereof. i record some vocals i want to eventually redo and i feel more frustrated as a musician then i have in a long time and yet...

i record demos of my ideas so i won't forget them and then i take a couple days to get back into a practice routine and it ends up making all the difference in helping me remember what it means to play guitar again. i play a little bit of a paganini exercise i practiced alot in college or i play "whiskey in the jar" or some johnny cash tunes to work on my vocal abilities and i find myself at ease again with myself. its a quiet night in somerville, the air is cool, and i feel at ease for at least a few minutes...

in other news, i bought the new radiohead album for $3. they said name your own price and i wanted to take part in this even with my normal shortage of funds. the reason why i felt really inclined to do this is that this felt like an *important* musical thing going on in the business. the songs may or may not be awesome but the way radiohead is helping present a model for digital music distribution is like a light going out to all the "sinners" aka downloaders like myself and millions of others. will we be repentent? or will we continue sinning? i am not sure but i like where this is all going.

as a good friend of mine named Eric Peltier was telling me, he thinks the model is good for radiohead but may not necessarily work for other artists. i tend to agree with this. obviously what this all represents is another step on the way to taking hold of the world we are given now and the possibilities we have to promote ourselves and merchandise ourselves digitally while still being able to profit from the venture. lots of other artists besides radiohead have been doing this for awhile now. i mean look at youtube or any other site where you can become an independent celebrity. but the key thing with the radiohead manuever is that it has the momentum and thought of all those other artists trying to reconcile the 21st century with the music business, however what radiohead has that others don't is a familiarity throughout pop culture with a strong history of integrity and critical notice and the sales history to bank on. so their endeavor will help shed a light on the movement as it were and open up more of the big wigs eyes to the things we all have been understanding and dreaming about and working towards for years.

testeroo

2007-10-10T06:09:00.000-05:00

testes testes 1...2...3?

art v. ambition

2007-10-07T01:08:00.000-05:00

i just sat through the special edition of the movie Dune. almost three hours long. and the entire time i was watching it i kept thinking about the idea of what separates art from ambition.

with all due respect given to the source material, as the novel gave birth to my long-aquired band name, i sat through the movie marvelling at the ambitious ideas that david lynch was trying to accomplish. obviously the special edition was put together without his consent and so i can't judge his intentions on it but i have seen the original cut and saw the problems with the way they told the story.

too much exposition, lots of inner monologue and not a ton of action. but at the same time it made the movie one of the most interesting film experiences for me. so i found myself liking the movie tremendously for what it was attempting to do and seeing faults with it at the same time.

so tonight while i watched i came back to the debate i was talking earlier about and wondering where the disconnect happened for david lynch and where that disconnect happens for any artist. he had grand ideas going into the movie i am sure and judging by the time put into the cinematography and effects he definitely was trying hard to achieve some sort of innovative use of the sci-fi film. but in the end nothing in the movie gels quite right.

so where did the ambition go and when did it decide to leave the final product or was the project doomed from the start.

as i type this i realize that this problem affects me too. i had a grand blog running in my head while i was watching the movie and couldn't wait to sit down and type it out. but the blog i am posting is hardly the kind of impressively well thought out idea i had in my head. so where did the disconnect happen? how will it affect other aspects of my creative life? has it already happened without my knowing? how do i prevent it?

just to add to the post below

2007-09-27T21:34:00.000-05:00

i don't want the tag "my sister my hero" to give the impression that i am playing favorites in my family.

the more i learn about them the more i realize the amazing things my family members have been capable of and they all are heroes to me in one way or another.

from battling mental disorder, to sacrificing their careers to raise their family, or working harder then they should have to just to provide a better life for their children, and working in the non-profit world to create a program to help challenged kids.

my family is made up of extraordinary people and i guess i just want to know where i fit in with them.

it occurs to me

2007-09-27T21:14:00.000-05:00

i was reading my sister Maria's curriculum vitae online tonight.

i have always maintained that there is a real disconnect between me and the rest of my family. not that we don't love each other or talk to each other but still i feel so different from the rest of them.

and this gets proven again when i look at all my sister's accomplishments and i realize that i know nothing about what she has done with her career.

she is a college professor and as i have stated before she has just published her first scholarly work but i still don't understand what she specializes in or what her interests are in her studies.

maybe i am afraid that given my normal tendency to disagree on alot of things with her and and my brother-in-law i won't be able to seperate them from their beliefs and i want to just view them as my sister and brother-in-law, no controversy, no arguments and i can have my familial bond in a state of complete blissful ignorance of the topics that she has devoted her life to researching and pursuing with her considerable intelligence.

at this point people always wonder if i am upset that she converted to Islam and to that degree i have to say no.

Islam is something that is thought of as quite divisive in today's political climate. i like to think that my lack of any real interest in following any given religion gives me some sort of view where i can not buy into all the generalizations that i am presented with in the media and just see her as my sister. she is not crazy as is also assumed when i mention her religious beliefs. i respect her deeply for choosing what she wants to believe in even if i don't fully understand it.

the heart of the matter is that Maria is and will always be an amazing person. she is smart and compassionate and never judges anyone in our family or treats them any differently then the way she treated them years ago before the conversion. and as i read her curriculum vitae i am amazed at what she has accomplished and what she has risked in the pursuit of her beliefs and what she wants to learn and say on them.

i hope in ten years when i am her age i can look back on my own career and be able to say i followed my heart and my brain in the right direction and that it will have provided me with a better life for myself the current state of adjustment i currently am residing in.

two days notice

2007-09-27T19:27:00.000-05:00

and i still managed to come up with some idea for a short solo for ryan's new death metal demo. it was kind of sloppy but he assured me it was ok due to the fact that it is just at the demo stage right now.

trying to shred again gave me some serious blisters on my fingertips. i guess that is what happens when all you have is an acoustic guitar laying around and you pretend you are a singer/songwriter and not a metal guitar god.

in other music news, i bought an ocarina. just a cheap starter one to get the technique down. i am hoping to build an army of instruments for use on the next baliset album.

i hate that i come up with good ideas but then i blog about them and all of a sudden the jinx strikes and a setback happens so i am just going to keep my mouth shut for the time being.

here is a random list of nothing relevant...things i got really excited about this week:

1. the iron maiden somewhere back in time tour next year - sure i have known about it for a few weeks but it doesn't stop bringing a smile to my face.

2. Julie recommended the comic book "preacher" and i got volume 1 last night and couldn't sleep till i finished it. it was mesmerizing and between that and the walking dead i have a good amount of new comic material to go through since i finally finished the sandman, v for vendetta, from hell, and watchmen.

3. the heroes season premiere was amazing...like joss whedon amazing which is saying something since i felt they went out with a whimper in may. but a strong opening that makes the season finale look a little better is a good thing and redeems my feelings on their writing staff.

4. Mike Gravel - the man has no chance of getting the democratic nomination because he is too old and curmudgeonly but that is exactly what made him so amazing in the debates last night. he didn't have to try and impress voters...he just verbally bitch-slapped hilary clinton, barack obama, and john edwards and that is what we need in a debate. we need someone to really play the extreme asshole card and catch them off guard and see who can really defend their policies and show us true presidential material. so far i am not all that impressed by any of them. they each have good ideas but the fringe candidates like gravel and kucinich just impressed me more because they have no reason to sugar coat their agendas, they aren't trying to fool anybody and it really made the debates more of a debate and not just robotic reading of pre-planned and rehearsed answers with $500 haircuts.

2007-09-19T00:20:00.000-05:00

its late and i have been working out the website a bit.

i have found i can't stick with one design long enough without it being ultra-cheesy in my opinion so here is my latest attempt.

i also signed up for nimbit which for those who don't know is an online music tool for indie artists that allows them to create cool webpages as well as setting up an online store for selling my stuff.

signing up for it definitely got me thinking about how i want to pursue stuff and i am hopeful to have something there in the early part of 2008.

the artwork for a time for rust is nearing completion and once i have settled everything with the artist i will probably be posting the cover art which is fucking amazing.

now i go to sleep

where i am a viking!

In my latest attempt at

2007-09-11T09:06:00.001-05:00

In my latest attempt at pushing the boundaries of workplace attire i am wearing a red iron maiden shirt for red, white, and blue casual day

new tuning tuesday

2007-09-04T22:02:00.001-05:00

DGCGAC

works well with the capo on the fifth fret

When a musician feels low

2007-08-28T23:32:00.001-05:00

When a musician feels low and not worth anything, the simple act of figuring out a melody to a song has an amazing redemptive quality...

moving and feeling kinda blue

2007-08-12T02:19:00.000-05:00

now don't misinterpret that title

i am moving out of revere and for that i am very happy. my living situation has kind of deteriorated here and i am glad to start over with new roommates in a new area with new things to encounter and see.

that being said of all i have experienced in revere i think i will actually really miss living so close to the blues diner on broadway. it was cheap delicious food served by a wonderful woman who treated you like a mother and made sure you had a great meal.

but its time to move on to pastures new close to harvard square

My most organized thoughts are

2007-08-03T15:31:00.001-05:00

My most organized thoughts are structured while i am wacked out of my mind on coffee

Insensitivity Training 101: i just

2007-08-03T13:24:00.001-05:00

Insensitivity Training 101: i just asked someone to pick me up a coffee extra "diabetic" meaning LOTS of sugar

I wanna be easy... easy

2007-08-03T11:20:00.001-05:00

I wanna be easy... easy like sunday morning

nekkid

2007-08-02T20:37:00.002-05:00

so allow me to lay out all the baggage on the table.

i tell myself that i am going to release an album in january and i start pursuing means of financing said operation and i get met with brick walls. record labels aren't really interested in me unless they don't have to spend money, banks won't touch me with a ten foot pole, and the words of wisdom i gained from a small business development center is that i am so financially fucked at the moment that i need to spend a year or so repairing my credit before he could even begin to suggest ways for me to start a record label and release my own music.

but the weird thing is that i didn't get super upset at these roadblocks because they made me realize that i haven't exactly worked hard enough on this project. i mean i put alot of time into the songs but if i am going to do this right and put something out with the quality i need to hold myself too then i am really going to have to work harder and make new goals.

so i am officially in research and hibernation mode. the vocal lessons are strengthening my resolve and confidence and i am reading alot of how you run a record label.

also i found an awesome artist name eliran kantor who has sent me a rough draft of the artwork and it is incredible so hopefully soon i can display it

this is where i think i am supposed to find out what i am made of and how hard i am willing to work to satisfy a dream.

although this doesn't exactly mean i can't release "something" in january. we'll see how the progress goes!

I can now txt my

2007-08-02T20:37:00.001-05:00

I can now txt my blog...CRAZY

Test

2007-08-02T20:31:00.001-05:00

Test

Jesus Sent Me A Myspace Message

2007-08-01T01:00:00.001-05:00

and he encouraged me to use a website to "get local pussy."

fascinating

i'll admit it...

2007-07-09T22:42:00.001-05:00

i really am a sucker for cryptic mysterious viral ad campaigns for strange movies about monsters attacking NYC based on that weird cryptic trailer that showed before the transformers movie.

i must have wasted over two or three hours today alone looking up stuff online about the movie and solving puzzles and wondering if it will really be about Cthulu and then thinking i should bone up on my Lovecraft...

kitty shhhhhhhhhh

2007-07-01T23:18:00.000-05:00

i am watching the kitty for a few days.

those of you who visited me at my last apartment know which kitty i am talking about.

having her here reminds me that it is getting close to the one year anniversary of getting pumpkin put to sleep.

i don't really talk about him much anymore but when the memories of that night come to me i get very saddened. it was just another in a series of fun blows which life decided to hand me last year.

life seems so much different now. there are still problems and issues but its like i am different person in alot of respects. i don't have a grand thought to come out of these words. i am just rambling for the moment because i can't sleep.

i believe i am getting closer to establishing a firm set of goals for myself musically.

i was checking out Toby's blog today and hopefully he won't mind me reposting this but when someone asked him if i was contributing to the new kayo dot album his response was "greg's not playing on this one.. although he's not disinvited or anything, but just busy with his own stuff and we're doing the guitars on the west coast."

anyhoo, i thought it was quite nice of him to put it like that, i guess it drove home for me that after 15 years of friendship and 10 of those years spent as bandmates, i was able to take the initiative to leave and pursue my own course in music while keeping a good friendship intact and that makes me happy.

now to just figure out what type of course i really am on musically and if the goals i am imagining for myself will be able to be fulfilled.

also

2007-06-24T23:20:00.001-05:00

i have signed up for vocal lessons!

War of the Worlds

2007-06-24T22:45:00.000-05:00

so i am sitting here in my bedroom...

i have been demoing new baliset songs on my computer alot this past week and a half or so.

my idea is to have the next album written and ready to record by the time i finish all the work getting "a time for rust" out by January and then i can book some time with Colin to get the new songs down ASAP so it won't take four years to have an album done.

i have noticed that my songs for the new album are alot simpler and song-y whereas on "a time for rust" i have a little more of an epic prog-rock feel to the songs even though at the core they are also nice songs i elaborated on.

i am not sure how exactly i feel about the songs just yet. i think they are the best and strongest ones i have done ever but am i being too simple with them? am i not trying hard enough to make them more interesting? or am i just waiting till i have the drums behind them so that i can let my imagination go wild over the top of them and make them sound way different?

i am not sure where exactly this will lead me but i am feeling good about this new album and the renewed vigor i have now to finish "a time for rust" definitely helps keep me motivated!

now i just need to get the finished keyboard tracks from John and finalize the vocals for dreamflesh and maybe add some nice instrumentation to a few other places and then voila we are ready to mix!

and then i set the mixing dates for november 12-16 at zing and hopefully i can get it mastered soon after that and off to the manufactuer for a January release! and a release from my mental energies as well!

i will try to keep my blog more up to date. i have really fallen behind the last few months...

ps. my current non-music interests this weekend have been nutella, the prelinger archives, watching alternative 3, orson welles on youtube, and listening to his original "war of the worlds" broadcast. f'n amazing!

baliset update

2007-06-01T21:55:00.001-05:00

finished vocals on three songs...

Its Been Awhile

2007-05-19T19:03:00.000-05:00

What has been up?

I got a girlfriend who is the most amazing girl. =)

I have a recording date with colin arctopus in a couple weeks too.

More updates will follow soon!

new tunings

2007-03-24T12:43:00.000-05:00

CGCEbBbD

CACEbBbD

Lyric Update

2007-03-13T20:12:00.000-05:00

also i have found myself thinking more about my silly thrash project and coming up with approriately silly lyrics for them. not parody type of silliness but your general violent lyrics about zombies, evisceration, and maybe some other fun topics.

"I Have Memory And Awareness But I Have No Shape Or Form"

2007-03-13T20:05:00.000-05:00

my insurance kicked back in which means i was able to get my zoloft prescription again. its been so long though and the anxiety was starting to creep back in so i had him also re-prescribe me some lorazepam while the zoloft works itself back into my system.

so this past week has been full of sedatives, slayer's reign in blood, visits with the fam, weird al, rush - hempispheres, and a general haze of knowing i have woken up, done stuff, and gone to bed.

but it beats that ol' familiar feeling of emptiness that resurfaced

No Longer The Only Member of My Family With Something on Amazon

2007-03-10T13:33:00.000-05:00

Fuck You Tom Cruise

2007-03-08T13:02:00.000-05:00

i am really enjoying the brain meds.

Penance

2007-03-06T19:46:00.000-05:00

"I'll do my best to suffer with some grace."

Aeon Spoke - Grace

Growing up in a devout Catholic household, penance was really a simple idea when I was a kid.

You do something "bad" and you go pray to God and BOOM you are pure again.

And that is how they fuck you up when you are religious like that because they don't warn you that the idea of what is truly wrong and what you should truly be sorry for changes drastically as you get older.

By the time I was in high school I already was skeptical of the idea because there I am telling a priest that I have sinned but at the same time neglecting to bring up the fact that during the summer of 1994 I probably jerked off up to three times a day because while i am sure I would have needed to say a few more Hail Mary's the bottom line was that in my heart I didn't regret it at all.

Now I am 28 and have lost my earlier faith but still have been struggling with how I define forgiveness and penance in my life because I feel like there is soemthing important there. And what I have come up with thus far is that at this stage of life penance can be expounded upon by asking the question "what do I deserve?"

The line isn't simple anymore and I am not the first person to say this but think about all you have done. For instance I can look back on ten years of living and realize the points when I was weak. I can see the times when I have lied and betrayed the trust of friends, when I have acted out of lust, when I have knowingly hurt someone's feelings or acted out of greed and selfishness and I look at all that and wonder how I can feel I deserve to have any success of any kind in any aspect of my life if I have not yet atoned for what I have done.

I don't mean this in a religious way since God himself will tell you I haven't gone near a confessional in almost ten years I bet but I wonder how successful I have been as a human in making up for what I have done. When have I done something special for a friend or been there for them? When have I truly tried to act selflessly towards another human and how can you possibly take everything from these two sides and then stack them up side by side. How would you compare and then what do you deserve? Do you deserve to be with someone special or living in a wonderful house or apartment? Or do you deserve to be on the outskirts of humanity barely getting by until you realize that most of what you encounter every day is so unimportant.

I am not able to make these kinds of judgements for myself but it gives me something to think about on days when all the world finds me worthy of despair and I am left to take it and smile and try and remember that this isn't second grade catholicism anymore. There is no great wiping of the slate and you will continue to chalk up transgressions and moral victories in life and do you believe this will inform or predict your ultimate place in life or will you finally realize that what you deserve isn't important anymore.

"If there's no great glorious end to all this, if nothing we do matters… then all that matters is what we do. 'Cause that's all there is. What we do. Now. Today."

Angel - "Epiphany" (Season 2)

sunday

2007-03-04T13:00:00.000-05:00

there's really no gentle or proper way to talk about anything that has been going on with me the last couple weeks.

and the movie "zodiac" is a really weird f'n movie experience.

If I were in charge of the Anti-Trenchcoat Defamation League

2007-02-19T18:50:00.000-05:00

I would definitely create some ads that show goth kids in trenchcoats like helping old ladies across the street and rescuing kittens from a tree or something.

You know so that people stop assuming that weirdos in trenchcoats are just capable of shooting up schools and shopping malls.

Guitar Tunings

2007-02-14T10:42:00.000-05:00

Since I have a habit of forgetting these tunings, let me make a record of the tunings I have been using for my new songs:

DADFCE

Dreamflesh
No Name
When You Speak, It Is Silent
Machinery

DADFCE (capo on 3rd fret)

Hesperus
The Great Extinction Event
If At All
Black Light Moon
Sanctuary In The Signal

Drop D

The Conduit
A Lesser Demon

Standard Tuning

A Time For Rust
The Echo Box
Winterlude
Remember, Remember

EFBbFCD

Kanduja
Spanish Song

CFBbEbGC

Untitled New Song

DADF#AE

Untitled New Song 2

Valentine's Day

2007-02-14T09:26:00.000-05:00

What do you think of when you think "Valentine's Day?"

Because, to me, right now, Valentine's Day means stopping by the library on my way home and picking up a book about Jack the Ripper.

There could be irony there if you look hard enough but I doubt you would care if you did find it.

"25 Years Of Being Not Important"

2007-02-13T10:20:00.000-05:00

I am constantly wondering these days what is good in this world about being a musician.

I'm 28 now and the desire to be some sort of revolutionary in the ways of guitar playing and sognwriting has really subsided and now my only real goal is to create. To prove that somehow, my music exists. I am not sure what purpose this serves and maybe my mind will change but right NOW this is what seems important even if the only person to hear it is me.

While we were on tour in Nashville, the owner of the club we played at, the Muse, let us watch a dvd of Overkill's performance there a week or so prior to our show.

Now I LOVE Overkill, much to the ridicule of my friends, so natuarally I took full advantage of watching them.

One thing I notice every time I see them live is that Bobby "Blitz" will always have some quip that he says that always gets to me. He doesn't just say random generic crap like most bands. I also doubt he spends alot of time thinking them up either. He just says what is on his mind and just like most of his lyrics, there is something interesting and unique to be found. I almost consider him a poet of sorts. Not all of his lyrics and quips are amazing(like most poets) BUT when he really gets going he really nails it sometimes. For reference see the lyrics to Skullkrusher.

So anyway at this show between songs he goes off on a rant about how Overkill was always kind pushed aside as being "not important" and then goes on to acknowledge the hundred or so people who paid to get in and said "well here's to 25 years of being 'not important!'"

And that phrase got to me you know? Here is a band who I am in awe of but who for the most part are overlooked and won't ever really get alot of attention paid to them when all is said and done and while for the egomaniacal musician out there this type of realization could make them want to give up, "Blitz" finds some kind of strength is this, a sort of full realization of his purpose and identity and has used this to continually work over the last 25 years. Other bands have come and gone and reunited and gone again but Overkill maintains.

It is like "Blitz" inadvertanly(or purposely) stumbled onto some sort of zen-like truth which he uses to manage his life and career and while I am sure the band is always looking to better themselves and their situation in life, sell more records and the like, it seems as if he has found the path that continuously flows for him and the band and allows him to have a good life and make a living doing what he loves and it seems like the kind of path I want for my musical career and life.

I could also just be reading way more into it.

Music Update #2

2007-02-12T17:23:00.000-05:00

Having recovered my amp from its hibernation in CT, my frist day playing through it again yielded the first of many thrash riffs which will in turn destroy the general public.

Now this Thrash band needs a name and I can't think of one!

Today however, I must return to try out the new Baliset ideas and songs through the amp.

The Future Will Be Here Soon

2007-02-12T17:20:00.000-05:00

Hopefully not just flying cars and possible armageddon but a world where digital music and commerce live freely and co-exist peacefully without the strains of the "Big Five" strangling the medium that is ultimately going to take over the way we handle music.

I love records just as much as the next guy, I love artwork, and I love packaging and I want to preserve that when the new wave finally reveals its true form.

But for now, all I can do is read about advocacy sites like this:

http://www.futureofmusic.org/

And then I can get involved and try to get others involved to the point where we take hold of the new medium and make it ours.

Radio Ga-Ga

2007-02-12T17:16:00.000-05:00

After journeying in a car to CT and back to pick some items up from my parents house I discovered something completely disturbing...

All the rumors I have heard over the years about how radio stations are becoming merged into conglomerate corporate pieces of shit are really true.

Hell yes I was naive to believe that there were still a few renegade stations out there doing what they felt was right but now all those stations have been swallowed up, polished, and outfitted with an obediance collar.

Mainstream radio is dead...Long Live College and Pirate Radio!

A Thought

2007-02-09T16:20:00.000-05:00

Upon much inner reflection...I am not really above utter contempt for humanity.

Random

2007-02-09T09:29:00.000-05:00

1. Its been about three months and without intending offense to my former bandmates, I have to admit that the novelty of being a free agent hasn't worn off yet. :)

2. Was reading a thing about the tunings Nick Drake used and it mentioned that he used a guitar in standard tuning with the G dropped down to F# on one of his songs. I played around with the idea and came up with some ideas that required furthur changes and so I came up with a cool new tuning for new songs: D A D F# A E or in other words an open Dmaj9 chord. This is kind of interesting because the tuning I have used on most of my other songs like "black light moon," "hesperus," "dreamflesh," etc. is D A D F C E or an open Dmin9 chord(with the minor 7th added for good measure).

Music Update #1

2007-02-09T09:18:00.000-05:00

1. Went to see Destruction at the Middle East and was getting tossed about near the pit when I realized it might be fun to just record a few thrash metal type songs and put it out as an ep under a different band name. Maybe throw an Overkill cover on there for fun. Considering I have the two Baliset albums underway in various stages, the prospect of doing this seems unlikely for the time being unless I can find a way to sneak in a quick recording session to do them and get them nice and raw!

2. Started trying out designs for a logo with the intention of creating a nice simple symbol I can use to put on a sticker to start promoting the band and the myspace page. Lack of performing means having to resort to different means of promotion to get the word out and maybe secure some funding to finish the album.

3. In talks with Colin for booking a few days at his studio in May to finish up vocals for "A Time For Rust." I figure he can really get me some decent takes at a great price.

4. Am pretty much convinced that when the tracks are ready, I will take them to back to Zing to let Jim mix them. It just seems like the right thing to do. Although album #2 might be just be a Colin affair once I get the material together and ready to record.

Don't Whiz On The Electric Fence

2007-02-09T08:53:00.000-05:00

I am sitting here questioning the idea of my work's "jean day."

See every friday they encourage their employees to wear jeans in exchange for voluntarily donating $1 to the charity of the week as it were. Now when I first was working here last year this seemed like an amazing idea! I mean there are like 2000 employees here or something and some give more than a dollar so the charities are really making out well here.

However, I was thinking that it might be a more beneficial idea to just to take $1 out of each employees paycheck every week and also have the bins set up for additional moeny the employees might want to donate. It seems to me that this would give the charities a more consistent and also bigger donation even though it would take away from the employee's personal satisfaction at donating in person every friday.

Maybe I am just saying all this as a way of excusing myself when I don't have a dollar in my pocket on friday and can't donate but still wear the jeans.

First Blog

2007-02-08T16:29:00.000-05:00

Ok so here is another in a long line of attempts by me to become all "internet-savvy" and start blogging.

Truth is, all I did was notice that Neil Gaiman had a blog set up on his homepage and I thought that seemed like a neat idea.

So here I am.

First things first: I know that I probably won't have anything to say that will be particurally ground-breaking or mind-expanding but I have been feeling like I have alot of thoughts in my head and it would be fun to just post them when the mood strikes me and then look back at them and cringe or maybe even go "hmmm, maybe I am on to something here!"

I also may spurt out utter nonsense for the fun of it, or pass along funny stories or links. Mostly it will probably just be about me and the status of my recording project for the few people out there who ask me about it.

So yep...here i go...